So I guess I’ll be writing my daily adventures on here. Haven’t kept a blog since high school.This blog will stay anonymous to my friends and entourage. I will never mention my name either. I do not need you to judge or criticize me this is something I am doing for myself so either read it or leave it :) I know I am far from being the role model here.
My life a little crazy, with random and unexpected things constantly happening to me. I think there must be a problem with the way I am living my life because so many of my friends tell me I should write a novel, or have my life made into a show, or want to write themselves about my adventures since my life seems to be so entertaining to everyone….so here it is, I am keeping a record of my stories here and I am hoping that writing all my thoughts down will help my sleeping issues since so many things seems to be running through my brain 24/7. Even though I am not sure where to start really, so much has happened in the last few weeks I don’t think I can go back writing on it.
I recently turn 22, graduated of college last month, and yet my life is still unstable when on the other half of my friends and classmates are in either stable relationship, pregnant, engaged, or married. Gosh, they make me feel so old, yet I am so far from that point of my life, I feel like an irresponsible young lady.
I just moved to L.A, and I think it’s only starting to really hit me now. I’m not sure why I moved there, it was sort of an impulsive move and I wanted a reason to leave Georgia. I couldn’t go back to Paris because my father moved in with his new girlfriend and her kids in an apartment in the 15th, so no bedroom for me, and I couldn’t stay in Charlotte with my mum due to tension between me and the stepdad, plus I never even lived there and I don’t like it. So I guess looking at the situation, although I do feel a bit lonely, this was by far the best option I had. And J. is here. My only friend but one of my best friend (considering I moved so many times I have “best friend” for each place I lived). I rather have few friends I can rely on rather than multiple friends I cannot trust. And I have relatives here and all over California. So I think it was a wise decision. But I think what really got me thinking about moving here was that night out in Hollywood with J. when I came in August. At that point everything had fell apart the previous month, between the ex getting engaged, the best guy friend betraying me and the new guy I was seeing dumping me for my Asian neighbor on the first floor, and the horrible teacher I had. That trip to LA and the family reunion at Napa Valley was a breather from all this craziness. For the first time I was going out, nobody knew me it felt great. And we met those two guy models down the street inviting us to join them to their table at the club. Me, who never looked at people in Savannah, had my eyes constantly upon all those attractive men everywhere. Then I get out of the club and meet this really cute French guy whom I met again couple weeks ago. I guess after a boring and harsh summer this night was an excitement.
But now I moved here, me and J both quickly realized that making friends in L.A was actually harder than we thought it would be. The nightlife in Hollywood quickly got old. Yes, it’s nice, we never pay or go wait in line for the clubs because somehow we always get lucky and get approached by promoters or guys inviting us to come with them before we even walked into any clubs, and always end up drinking greygoose vodka all night long. But in exchange of what? Ending up all night with guys that want to get in your pants, or people that think they are some sort of superstar, all those wannabe actors/models, and promoters who think they are so important.
People are beautiful but no one is interesting….no one to have an actual conversation with. No potential friends. It’s weird, I always had more guy friends than girlfriends but here, it’s a different story. And this is a driving city. I can’t just walk and meet people off the street really.
Here I either get the guy who wants to sleep with me or the guy who get so overly romantic and keep complimenting me and talking about relationship it makes me go crazy. I wish someone would just wanna talk to me, normally. Did everyone forget how to have a normal conversation? How to really connect with others?