anonymousdiary

Diary of a Stranger

Jeudi 15 novembre 2012 à 12:01

It's that time of the night again. I'm confused. Sometimes I wonder if I don't have some slight bipolar tendencies. 
As much as I like the working environment at my office, and how much I'm learning, something hasn't change: it's not what I want to do. I told my brother a couple months ago that I don't think I wanted to be an interior designer anymore and his reply was : you have the syndrome of "the grass is always greener on the other side".My original plan when I decided to move to LA was to work for a year or two before going back to school for my master in a complete different field. Then after a month here, and working for a week, in my mind I started to plan my life differently. Make a career in interior design didn't seem so bad anymore, now I wanted to have my own firm in 5 years. Everything was fine until I got some free time at the office and stat researching some architecture and design projects. The first article I found was on Mass Design Group, this non profit architectural organization I always wanted to work with. Then I went on a couple non profit architectural organization. I also went on HOK to see all their new sustainable LEED projects.
I have a contact from HOK in Atlanta, who said he could send my resume in Hong Kong. I always thought I should ask him if he could send it to the LA office. I don't know I guess I realized today, what happened to all my dreams of helping out and contributing? What happened to my two major interests, if I was to master in one of them, either architecture or sustainable design so I could work with engineers to come up with new solutions to create net zero building. And I was hoping to work on community projects on the side.
My other last goal, which I informed my mum about and is encouraging me, is journalism and international relations. My writing wasn't good enough until the last few years of college, since my education has been split half French, half American, it took me a while in order to perfect either of those language. 
But I always was interested in working for the United Nations, become a diplomat just like my politics teacher wanted me to do, or become a reporter like Lisa Ling investigating and addressing different issues. Those majors can open so many doors, and is so broad, the only thing is that it's so far stretched from design. Is it possible that I ever decide to go back to school? Are my goals achievable? I don't know 

But once thing I know, I feel like there is something missing. Is owning my own firm designing houses for the LA socialite fulfilling to my life? 

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